Deb Calvert on Discover Questions Get you Connected

Deb Calvert   

Thank you, Subhanjan. I am truly honored to be here with you. As always, you have recognized the need and are fulfilling it with the Sales and Marketing Lit Fest 2023. I love how you are bringing together authors and readers in the sales and marketing space from around the world. So, thank you very much for including me. I will now announce something exclusive to the participants of the Lit Fest. It hasn’t been officially announced anywhere else before. But before I do that, let me provide you with a bit of background.

I will be discussing “Discover Questions” here. “Discover Questions Get You Connected” was released in 2013 and has received numerous accolades and awards. I am truly honored by the response to this extensive research on asking questions that foster connections between buyers and sellers. HubSpot included it in their list of the top 20 sales books of all time, and at that time, it was the only book by a female author and a self-published author. It was alongside names like Zig Ziglar and other greats. I have been thrilled to ride this wave over the past 10 years and share “Discover Questions” with so many people.

However, things have changed since we conducted that research back in 2011, 2012, and 2013 before we published. While much of it is still relevant, there have been new circumstances, trends, and buyer needs that require attention. That’s why we will be releasing the tenth Anniversary edition of “Discover Questions” in September 2023. Today, I would like to share some of the changes you can expect to see in this all-new, completely updated edition.

The new edition will feature all-new stories, examples, and research to help sellers effectively connect with buyers on a human level. Along the way, I will provide background information and highlight the contrasts between 2013 and 2023, discussing what’s different and what is being addressed.

For those who are not familiar with “Discover Questions,” the premise is as follows: we conducted extensive research by interviewing buyers and sellers. We spoke to sellers both before they learned how to ask quality questions and before they understood the constructs of what makes a good question and the eight purposes for asking questions. We interviewed the seller also interviewed their buyers before the sellers went through some training and were able to use eight types of questions. And then after. And the contrasts were dramatic. When sellers use Discover Questions, that’s an acronym for the eight purposes of asking questions, when sellers know how to mix this up, to use more than just the data, outcome, and consequence questions that are so widely understood and widely used in selling— when they mix it up, especially by asking some value and solution, and example questions, well, that’s where sales accelerate and buyers feel completely different about the sellers that they’re doing business with. So, this has really taken off with people around the world. We’ve had a small army of trainers teaching people about Discover Questions, and this model is still absolutely essential and accurate. We haven’t found a ninth purpose for asking questions. I joke about that because for the longest time I thought there’s got to be something else out there, and I was perfectly happy to change the acronym into “Discovery” if we needed to do that. But in all these years, we haven’t found it— a ninth purpose. So Discover has been validated over and over again. The end result of asking quality questions is that buyers say, “This is the person, this is the seller I look forward to working with. This is the one that I actually want to do business with,” and we don’t want to change anything there. But we do know that there are some new mega-trends. In 2013, we covered the mega-trends in selling at that time. So much has changed though that these trends are different. What we’re seeing with buyers today, what we’re seeing in the world of selling demands different responses because of what’s happening.

So the first of these, the first thing that you have to consider is that sellers have been and need to continue being the value creators, not the value deliverers from your product, not the value adders because you plussed up something or you gave some great discount. But the creators of value like poof in an instant right then when you’re talking with your buyer, that conversation itself is creating real, lasting value. But not only that, you know, buyers have become demanding. Buyers are expecting sellers to show up as leaders. Now, this was a separate body of research, and it shows up in the book that I wrote with Jim Kouzes and Barry Posner in 2017. That book is called “Stop Selling and Start Leading,” and it talks about the very specific behaviors that cause buyers to respond more favorably to sellers. Certainly asking questions, Discover Questions, fall within a few of those behaviors. But there are other behaviors too that sellers, I don’t know about, so that they can be a leader in those conversations with buyers. The third big trend that we’re seeing, it’s undeniable, is that sellers need to be good critical thinkers. Being a good critical thinker helps you to overcome objections. It helps you to show things to your buyers that they might be missing and to help them understand the importance of seeing things in a new way and of understanding those, and the fourth of these mega-trends. Well, this is complementary to being a critical thinker, and that is that sellers need to be sense-makers. And if you’re hearing that word “sense-making” or “sense-maker” for the first time, I strongly encourage you to go and take a look at the Gartner research around this concept. It’s just what it sounds like. A seller who can help make sense out of all the choices, options, and risks of inaction. A seller who can help a buyer make sense of all that has a distinct advantage over one who’s pushing and generically trying to sell something. Being a sense-maker is how you cut through information overload because we’re all grappling with that. Buyers are no different. Information overload or “infobesity” is at epidemic levels, and the person who can create value in an instant by helping make sense of the questions, especially the unanswered questions that a buyer might have, well, that’s the seller who stands out. That’s true meaningful differentiation.

So, we are going to address those mega-trends in the tenth-anniversary edition of “Discover Questions Get You Connected.” But we’re also going to take a look at the new competencies that sellers need. And some of these have been emerging. They won’t sound entirely new to you, but more than ever, it’s time to turn up the volume and really showcase these skills if you’ve got them. And if you don’t, no more ducking, dodging, denying. It’s time to get busy, double down, and go develop these skills.

The first is to be able to listen, not just passively, not even actively, but with empathy. To listen with your heart, not just your brain or your ears. And to be able to respond human to human, to the emotion that buyers are expressing. In addition to the content of whatever it is that they’re trying to tell you, sellers also need to develop learning agility, which will help you be a better critical thinker and sense-maker. Learning agility just means being able to cross-apply something you learned in one situation and now use it in a similar but not identical sort of situation. These two competencies are not unique to selling; they are considered to be compensatory competencies. Meaning if you develop these two competencies, they will compensate for whatever competencies you don’t have, at least for a little while. People will give you grace. They’ll indulge a little extra time with you if they can see that you are agile as a learner and genuinely listening to them.

Sellers also need to remain open and become more curious, to truly operate as investigators. Not just to the point where you get a little opening that you can pounce on, but curious and open to learn and understand, so that you really can empathize with your buyer and help them make sense of all those options they have. Sense-making, all by itself, is a competency. And I won’t go into great detail here. Like I said, you can look at that Gartner research, but we’ll also be covering this in the tenth-anniversary edition of “Discover Questions Get You Connected.” It’s a higher-level skill that involves being able to discern which information is relevant, even if it’s contrary to what you have already thought. You are going to take a deeper look at it anyway because you don’t want to just operate with confirmation bias, selecting out only the information that proves your point. You want to look at all angles and be very discerning and efficient in the way you process and utilize information.

And sellers need to be leaders. You need leadership competencies. There’s no mistake about it. In that book, “Stop Selling and Start Leading,” we interviewed 530 B2B buyers in panel studies. We asked them what would make them more likely to take a meeting with a seller and what would make them more likely to choose to do business with a certain seller. The buyers were very clear about their preferences and the behaviors they favor from the sellers they choose to do business with. These behaviors align with the competencies that make leaders effective. So, it is increasingly important for us to cut through and differentiate ourselves in order to truly help our buyers.

Now, this is what drives all the changes. Some of this you may already know, but the world around us is changing rapidly. Technology, AI – it’s hard to keep up, and buyers experience it in every aspect of their lives. While you may be a B2B seller, your buyer is also a consumer, and they are spoiled by the experiences they have with businesses in other areas of their lives. They expect, or rather, demand that you keep pace with them and support them in ways that make their lives easier, their jobs more efficient, and their interactions clearer and faster. Technology plays a significant role in this.

That’s one of the driving factors for change. Another one is the fact that we live in a VUCA world. We’ve been in this state for a while now. VUCA stands for volatility, uncertainty, complexity, and ambiguity. However, there’s a new term that supplements it – BANI. We love acronyms, don’t we? BANI represents our emotional state and our response to the VUCA world, especially in a post-pandemic context. BANI stands for brittle and anxious. It seems that the smallest things can make us crumble at any moment, but it’s actually the sense of overload that causes this fragility. People are not only brittle but also anxious. They often have a misplaced sense of urgency that interferes with quality decision-making.

Moreover, things around us are nonlinear. While we are brittle and anxious, the decisions we make, the information we receive, and the events we connect the dots between don’t always follow a logical path. This makes committing to long-term planning difficult due to the uncertainty and ambiguity we face. Everything being nonlinear has a significant impact on us.

Last but not least, not only are things complex and ambiguous, but the “I” in BANI stands for incomprehensible. Some things simply don’t make sense. The answers to the questions we ask often don’t make sense either. We tend to gloss over them as a coping mechanism, leaving them uncomprehended and hanging over our heads, causing even more anxiety.

This is the state of the world we live in, and you’ve probably experienced it too. But to help your buyers make decisions and gain clarity, we need to be able to support them, even though they’re experiencing this BANI phenomenon in a VUCA world. Economic changes also play a significant role. The uncertainty and its impact on personal finances cause reservations, delays, and sales process slowdowns. Consequently, it becomes even more crucial for you to instill confidence in your buyers when working with you.

Moreover, there’s another factor that has always been present, although it remains timeless. While we don’t have any more or less time than before, we now face an abundance of distractions and options on how to utilize our time. It feels like the options are infinite, which only adds to our sense of confusion, lack of commitment, and struggle to make sense of it all. This is the experience your buyers are going through.

Now, here’s the good news. There is one skill, and only one, that I know of, which can address all the challenges of navigating in a VUCA world and supporting clients who are in a BANI state—brittle, anxious, experiencing nonlinear and incomprehensible reactions. This skill allows you to create value instantly, be a strong critical thinker and sense-maker, develop empathetic listening, and embrace agile learning. It encompasses all these competencies, making it incredibly important, not only for sellers but for anyone aiming to build trust-based relationships and connect with people.

Above all else, that one skill is the ability to ask quality questions. These questions go beyond throwaway inquiries; they are well-constructed, purposeful, and capable of solidifying relationships and building bonds of trust. Quality questions create value instantly, prompting people to pause, reflect, and respond with statements like, “Wow, that’s a really good question.” This word cloud represents the responses of buyers who appreciate quality questions, and recent research further confirms and amplifies these reactions.

As a result, asking quality questions enables you to steer the conversation, assuming the driver’s seat. It signals your clear purpose, allowing the buyer, the passenger, to relax and engage in the journey with you. These questions not only provide the necessary information for both you and the buyer to think through, but they also generate high-value outcomes instantly. They accelerate progress from where you are to where you want to be, due to their efficiency and effectiveness. Moreover, quality questions foster a two-way dialogue, creating value and strengthening bonds of trust.

Last but not least, quality questions provide the buyer with an experience they expect, considering their experiences as consumers in the wider world. The buyer experience matters greatly, and quality questions unlock the full potential of that experience. While you await the release of the tenth-anniversary edition of Discover Questions in September, I encourage you to explore the People First Leadership Academy, whose URL is displayed on the screen. The Academy offers free instruction on critical thinking and building two-way trust, so be sure to check it out.

Once again, Subanjan, thank you for your efforts here. I look forward to hearing from the other speakers and have already gained valuable insights this morning. I appreciate the work you’re doing.

Subhanjan Sarkar   

That was a great session from Deb, and questions are a key component of sales. Those of us who practice it know that discovering the actual pain points our customers face relies on asking the right questions. Today, we have Peter Cohan joining us, who will discuss his book on discovery. This is an important topic, and I’m glad both Deb and Peter are here to share insights from their books, as it is a critical aspect of sales. I hope you’re enjoying the session thus far, despite a few glitches here and there. We’re all learning together. We will take a short break now, but make sure to come back because the next session is going to be exciting. You won’t want to miss it.

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